Soft Skills Trump Hard Skills
February 12th, 2008 | Michael Q. Pink
For the next while, I want to address the great need in the body of Christ and certainly in my own life for what I call the “soft skills.” Hard skills include things like workmanship, oratory ability, logistic ability, planning skills, and many, many more. But without soft skills, we are in great danger of a fall (Prov 16:18) and the loss of all we have worked so hard for. Worse yet… we may keep what we worked for and lose our family, our friends, our soul. (Mark 8:36)
Soft skills are so important that Solomon names two key soft skills (humility and the fear of the Lord) and claims they are the way to riches and honor and life. But then there are the fruit of the Spirit with love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and self control. These are exactly the kind of soft skills I am speaking of.
I think it best to begin with humility because when we succeed in business (or even sometimes in our efforts to succeed), we can easily become prideful, boastful, and self-important. I know that is something I must fight. I don’t like to admit that, but it is true and I fear the consequences of a proud or haughty spirit. So what are the signs of lack of humility or pridefulness? We shall examine a few. But today I ask you… Will you walk on this journey with me? Will you contribute to the discussion? Specifically, will you share your insights on the telltale signs of pridefulness in our own life? I look forward to your thoughts…
February 12th, 2008 at 8:52 am
Proverbs 3:7,8 Do not be wise in your own eyes;Fear the Lord and depart from evil. It will be health to your flesh and strength to your bones. NKJV
Ask the Lord today to show you how you have been wise in your own eyes. When you do expect the healing to come.
February 12th, 2008 at 8:58 am
Soft Skills Trump Hard Skills
So that’s how you play a trump card, it’s a universal equalizer. I didn’t realize that. Judo means Gentle Way. Business and Politics. I have a few trump cards that I can play.It’s time to count the cost.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:09 am
When I start sentences with the word, “I”, too much then I know my self- centeredness needs to be brought to the cross. It’s not about me and what I’m doing, but it is about what He has done. That produces thankfullness.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:12 am
Mr. Pink, Let me first say how much I enjoy your insight.
Humility is one of the hardest of the soft skills yet the key to the others.
I for one could not be and would not be a Christian if I had not humbled myself before my Savior; admited I am a sinner and asked for his forgiveness.
For me, no other soft skill could save me; but once humbled comes other soft skills like faith,love, caring, meekness and the peacefulness promised us.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:20 am
I used to think I was a pretty smart guy. As I, “grew in the Lord”, I began to think, “if you’re so smart, how come you’re not happier than what you are.”
My Big Brother Christ began to reveal to me just how prideful I was. Then He led me to, “the Lord resists the proud but exhaults the humble.” I think I started to get it. He once said to me, ” who’s smarter, me or you?” Why do I strive so much with my own plans when the smartest person in the Universe already has His plans for worked out?
Praise the Lord that our God is a patient God!
Dave
Highly Favored…(Prov 3:4)
February 12th, 2008 at 9:26 am
This is truly where the battle ground for my ultimate destiny lies as of late, both professionally and personally; to choose a life of fulfillment in the world’s mold of self-centered ambition or Christ-centered surrender and humility.
Christ took on the roll of the servant, humbling himself in service to those he could have easily lauded power over. Humility for me is knowing, when properly centered, that everything I am and every blessing in the world, my life, and in others, comes from God. Humility means to surrender daily and often multiple times in the day to God. And this surrender simply means to acknowledge my need for Him and to ask Him for guidance, wisdom, truth, and HUMILITY.
At this point, I find it impossible to sequester my own raging ego in a professional sales world that glorifies self achievement. I have failed often and frequently on and off the field of business in this endeavor, just the way God designed it, so that my need for a Savior may be apparent.
Keep your diligent work coming, as there are many warriors of the Faith who are encouraged and blessed by the message your emails contain.
And how relevant today’s post is!!!!
Best Regards,
Michael Bernard
February 12th, 2008 at 9:30 am
Two keys I have learned in dealing with pride in my life. . . one - be brutally honest with myself. Second - whenever I am being attacked I will try to protect myself with pride and be tempted to think thoughts. . .well I have a better relationship with Him than they do . . . well, at least I don’t sin like they just did against me. . . etc. One day I cried out, “Father, their slander is making it so tempting for me to defend myself and get into pride. . .I need You to keep me.” Well, I hardly need to put the end of the story. . . He kept me!! I am amazed how tempting it is to look to pride to defend, comfort and reassure myself when I’m hurt by other people but He does a much better job. He quiets me with His love.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:41 am
A telltale sign would be having to go to the phone about my troubles instead of to the throne. I think a lot of people confuse humiliation and humility. Humiliation is something that happens to you, sometimes even because of things you do. Humility is something you volunteer for and walk in, sometimes out of your humiliation.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:43 am
I, too, am continuously fighting off prideful thoughts. Sometimes they come in the manner of comparing myself to others, either in the Church or in the world. This morning, as I was listening to music about sharing His love with the world, it occurred to me that I will treat people differently sometimes if I know their “BIG” sin, i.e. homosexuality, adultery, etc. The Lord asked me if I would behave differently if I didn’t know their sin. My answer, was, of course, “Yes, I would.” The next thing that came to me was, “To whom much has been given, much will be required.” I must not overestimate myself, but rate my own ability soberly. I am learning to embrace correction as He brings things to my attention. Brutal honesty IS required in this walk. I don’t want to fid myself disqualified because my love grew cold…
February 12th, 2008 at 9:50 am
I believe the Master summed it up best when he said “he that looses his life for my sake, shall find it.” The apostle Paul echoed this when he said ” I die daily.”
It’s a daily “walking out” of laying down my plans/purposes/pursuits and living out the plans/purposes/pursuits that I find resounding in “the secret place of thunder”, those desires that reverberate in my spirit. Those things that I find are unattainable if I use the natural resources that I now posses, but which MUST be pursued by faith, which springs forth from the promises of God (His Word).
John the baptist had some insight on this subject when he said “He (Jesus) must increase, but I must decrease.”
February 12th, 2008 at 9:53 am
“I think it best to begin with humility because when we succeed in business (or even sometimes in our efforts to succeed), we can easily become prideful, boastful, and self-important.”
Thank you for the reminder of the deceptiveness of pride.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:05 am
This is an excellant topic to address.
I believe we don’t need to look for the praise of man and yes when we learn to stay humble God can work exalting us in His timing and then even after learning this we need to stay humble through out our entire life.
I recently read this quote
“We are to be recognized in heaven and feared in hell.”
God Bless!
In Christ Anna
amholtom@telus.net
February 12th, 2008 at 10:07 am
Good timing, good hearing from the Lord. The Church has spent too much time in self-improvement. We need to see ourselves on the shore of the Red Sea with Moses - nowhere to go but forward in faith. Moses I’m sure, did a quick self-assessment and found his strength less than the answer. Save us by your strength Lord, or let us die here…We will not go back.
Too many sermons, too many programs, not enough living in the Vine!
February 12th, 2008 at 10:07 am
Michael, When I set goals to significantly increase both my income and my giving, God put me through His training program to reveal my heart & motives. That is, He put pressure on me to reveal my pride and bring me to a place in which my only hope was to cry out to Him to deliver me. When I thought through the possible worst-case–that I could lose all I have–I realized He will still be with me on the other side. Then I had peace. I’m still waiting for the breakthrough, but I’m trusting Him.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:10 am
When business goes well pride is our companion but he quickly leaves when things get tough; why do we have to wait for tough times to get humble?! I want to be humble without despite the circumstance
February 12th, 2008 at 10:21 am
Working in an engineering company,
WE have the duties to produce a product for a client.
The Team has their inputs in varied disciplines.
I do the Electrical/Controls part,
and if I start saying i alot in my speech I know that I have started that walk towards pride.
Because it is the team, WE.
Not just ME.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:22 am
1 Corinthians 13:1-8 comes to mind as I read this post. In all our efforts to build kingdom businesses, develop ministries, memorize scriptures, evangelize and so on we must ask ourselves are we really doing it out of love? Lately, I’ve been convicted that my “press” was to reach the “mark” of being effective and successful in the kingdom, instead of the mark to demonstrate the character of Christ. All of the miracles and sermons that Christ performed were the “results” of His love, not the end. Love never fails.
Mr. Pink the Lord is using you and your platform in a mighty way. Thank you for submitting to His will.
Blessings!
Keisha
February 12th, 2008 at 10:31 am
Michael, an interesting corrollary to the attributes of humility and fear of the Lord would be the two fixtures in the Holy Place of the Tabernacle. One is the Menorah, (symbolizing the Light/Fear of the Lord and was placed towards the south side of the Tabernacle), and the other is the Table of Show Bread, (Shulchan in Hebrew - a symbol of the provision, and riches of God and was placed at the north side of the Tabernacle). When entering the Tabernacle, one was facing directly east with the Menorah to the right and Shulchan to the left.
Two Hebrew tribes, Zebulon and Issachar typify these Tabernacle fixtures. Zebulon was a sea merchant and Issachar a Torah, (Hebrew Scripture), scholar. Zebulon’s purpose was to support Issachar in his Torah studies. Issachar provided the light of Torah so that Zebulon would prosper. Both were required to support the other for God’s purposes to be achieved.
One of the final blessings of the Shabbat ,(Sabbath), service is titled “Ayts Chaiyim”, (A Tree of Life - Referring to the Word of God). It goes like this, “A tree of life it for those who take hold of it, and blessed are the ones who support it. Its ways are ways of pleasantness, and all its paths are peace. Long life is in its RIGHT, (Menorah), hand; in its LEFT, (Shulchan), are riches and honor. HaShem, (God), was pleased for the sake of His Righteousness, to render the Torah, (Word of God), great and glorious.”
One of the questions you asked in the post was what the telltale signs of pridefullness were in our individual lives. I notice two things when pride begins to rear it’s ugly head; 1) short temperedness and 2) a lessening in the desire to pursue God more intensely.
Blessings and Shalom
February 12th, 2008 at 10:32 am
Michael,
When I read your email this morning a certain chord was struck within me. Several years ago I was becoming quite successful and was becoming, quite frankly, arrogant and self absorbed with my success. I was beginning to feel like it was all my work that had caused my success. The wake up call came when my industry crashed and 80% of my customers that had given me much success and money went overseas, leaving me to wonder what happened. In the three years to follow God forced me to my knees, having to rely, once again on Him and His grace. I am so grateful to God that I was forced to my knees and being humbled. Since those years I have gained my MBA and have started to crawl out of the hole I was in. God helped me through my schooling and was gracious to help me graduate with honors while working and traveling full time for my position at the time.
Through all of this time I was grateful to God for His mercy and His grace.
Thank you for your wonderful posting. I so appreciate your insight.
Sincerely,
Jon
Vancouver, WA
February 12th, 2008 at 10:44 am
How amazing theLord’s timing in this subject…truly pride appears in my life every time success results from an action taken from my part; and it’s almost as if now, I hate any kind of praise, or compliment or aknowledgement; sometimes, I don’t want to “do”, so that I wont get those ugly thoughts of ‘I did it!”…I fear God’s way of bringing down the lofty as the first chapters of Isaiah confirms, I’ve experienced it before…but sometimes it seems as if the pride is an entity of its own, an untamed beast that bursts out, and won’t hold back, despite of efforts to confine it to it’s cage. I like to do my best in any task before me, whether in my position at work, at home, at church…though there are times the drive fades for a time, then it returns. Going back to pride, it is an evil that renders me useless, handicap, and quenches the zeal to do; I fear there is too much of me still alive, and I know that such ‘tin’ must be burned, the dross removed, so that in all the accomplishments, it will be clear in my thoughts, soul and heart that it is the Lord’s sovereign will which always prevails, and all things are His doings…me, just a vessel. Maybe I’m too focused on doing and not on just being; whatever it is, it separates me form fellowship with the Lord, as if He turns his face away, displeased with my heart…yet I still seek Him, and ask Him to do the inevitable, the bringing down, despite the pain, whatever is needed to mold my existence into His . And so, He does.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:47 am
After being a part of “evangelical Christianity” all of my life and experiencing disappointment and disillusionment with all of it– except the Author and finisher of my faith–Jesus Christ. I recently had a revelation of humility as I worked along side a successful, seasoned lawyer. (I am a paralegal.) He is a man who has regard for EVERYONE he comes in contact with and he considers others’ opinions no matter their training and status in life. He is not a “know-it-all”, “I’m right, you’re wrong” person. He listens and responds with wisdom and sincerity. He never mentions his “busy schedule” so as to try to impress. The absence of hidden agendas, insincerity, which can only be judged as plainly a lie and dishonesty truly impresses me and I see it as true humility. He taught me humility that “reaches out and touches”.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:59 am
Thank you for your postings, although I have never responded, I felt led by the Holy Spirit to post today. The reason that I am posting is because of my ministry. My husband and I have a youth group that meets in our home on Mondays, it consists of about 12 high school boys ranging in ages 15-18. Sometimes I get so frustrated with these boys because I feel I’m wasting my time. I spoke with my Pastor and he reminded me that I’m here to plant the seed and that I may never see the harvest and that I should remember that God must get the Glory, not me. I was becoming prideful, thinking that it was me who was doing the “work”. God used my Pastor and my teen-age son to humble me and put be back on track. If I am to be a servant of my Lord, I must not want to receive any credit for the good that comes out of having a youth ministry. Please keep me in prayer that God would continue to keep me in humility.
Thank you and God bless!
Josie Archuleta
February 12th, 2008 at 11:00 am
Michael-
I’ve found a repeated phrase in coming before the Lord during this season- Lord I humble myself before you. John
February 12th, 2008 at 11:11 am
I know that this is a stuggle that keeps me asking God for truth on, as I grow in my business I dont want to forget who put me there.
February 12th, 2008 at 11:24 am
I can so relate to your topic today. I work in the insurance business. In the sales world, it’s all about sales and becoming on top. We can’t all be number 1 in one company. Many times the Lord has blessed and multiplied my business. I have sometimes become ‘unthankful’ and sort of become ‘puffed up’ in my own thinking. I need to hear and to listen to what you have to say on this matter.
I do believe that ‘iron sharpens iron’ and therefore, I hope to glean from this important topic.
Thanks for being brave enough to tackle this subject!!
February 12th, 2008 at 11:26 am
Michael, great post this morning. My question though is, How do you see hard skills and soft skills fitting together? Soft skills (character) always trumps hard skills (competence), but the lack of hard skills can also in some ways trump our soft skills in the area of influence in the workplace. Most of us don’t have a clue what love, joy, peace, patience etc. look like in a performance drive workplace. Sometimes Christians have emphasized character to the neglect of competence and then don’t understand why people aren’t interested in hearing about their faith. On the other hand who would want to listed to someone talk about Christ whose life showed no evidence of Christ in their life. Bottom line: when competence and character go together, they create authority. One without the other severely cripples out work and out witness.
February 12th, 2008 at 11:36 am
WOW! Here’s my answer - that God’s been drumming into me for a looong time. Everyone who is leadership - either in Christian ministry or Corporate world - who names Jesus as Lord is compelled to follow His example of HOT; humble obedient and teachable. Easier to say than to be. Pat Baldridge, C12 Chair Charlotte, NC
February 12th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
Humility is realizing that without Christ I am nothing, but in Christ I can do all things. That is one thing I always try to remember. Where pride is a problem for me is when I think I can figure things out for myself, and I don’t need any help from anyone. I make myself an island, but lately I have been blessed by people God has put around me to help me with life’s struggles. I have come to realize what I have been missing out. It is so important to stay humble before the Lord, and to be transparent to others who are your spiritual fathers.
February 12th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Lack of humility comes out when I can’t take the time to listen to other people, like my wife, son, or fellow co-worker. I don’t want to take the time because I think my ideas, knowledge, and solutions are always better. How humble is that?
February 12th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
We own two businesses which are struggling.
My spouse is Jewish and I am Christian.
The problem here in an odd way is not pride but maybe total lack of confidence.
He doesnt think we do anything right ever, and he has lost all ambition.
We actually maintain a more humble business than others in the field in our area. How do you separate pride from confidence in what you do or what services you offer?
February 12th, 2008 at 12:31 pm
This is a blessing to see. Real responses to real questions. I beleive that some of the “soft” skills are easier for me because of practice through out the years and some of “hard” skills are too. But if I am not consistent in lets say giving or FORgiving its NOT easy, OR pleasing to God. Jesus says, “if you love me (rather are IN love with me) you will keep my commandments (rather you will NOT think about NOT keeping them because of our relationship). So if its about relationships then we should be practicing what we want to become and also what we would like to see modeled in our workplace, the marketplace and the home because our intimacy with the Father is reflected to all who are affected by our lives.
Lets labor therefore to enter His rest
Keith
February 12th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
hello Michael,
I truely believe this is vital to ourselves, and our ability to advance God’s kingdom today as well. People of this world are not looking for people with ego problems. Those who do not know Christ are hurting and looking for those who are humble and willing to help. We must constantly die to ourselves daily as Paul advises. We must ask God to help us, and I truely believe as we see in Ezekial, to “Prophesy audibly” daily to our flesh; that “it would be crucified” so that Christ can be exalted in us for the world to see.
February 12th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
I grow weary of my twisted mind. I pray for God to help me with business opportunities, He does, then “I” have figured it out. Rest is not found anywhere in self-centeredness. Help me Lord to humbly accept your provision.
February 12th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
I recently realized that pride can creep up in the workplace really quickly. I have been feeling spread thin and not appreciated by my employer. The outline of my job duty had become invisible, I took on many different hats trying to be a boss and co-worker pleaser. I was feeling sorry for myself about that when my employer jumped on me about my attendance. It smarted. I left earlier a few times for appointments etc. but felt I had made up for it in so many other ways. I realized after receiving the correction from my employer that it was true that I had been letting my home life affect my work life, not to an extreme degree but enough to bother her. I was hurt because my job duties have tripled since I started. I realized something though. I let that happen to me. It didn’t give me the right to not do what was initially required of me. I realized that even if I felt my boss had taken advantage of me, it did not give me the right to take advantage of her. I am humbled. I am not the owner of my own company yet, but I would like to be someday. I believe God has been showing me both sides of the coin. Humbleness lays on both side. It’s easy to look and see what I think my boss has done wrong. Harder to look at what I’ve done wrong. I’ve tightened up ship since then and have repented to the Lord. I know that true humbleness requires action on our own part 1st. If something needs to change in my position of employment after then I know God will point me in the right direction only after taking care of my part.
February 12th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
I enjoy many of your e-mails. I tend to go the other way with a lack of confidence due to a lack of a physical father during my life. I would appreciate prayer for healing for that and the results of much verbal abuse from my family. I have been in bondage and have suffered much self abuse-have not been able to succeed due to this. I am 55 y. o. and just lost another job. I don’t seem to know what to do. Please pray for me.
February 12th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
How amazing it is to see God working in so many lives. My wife and I are personally growing in the Father’s Love but I have seen areas in my life, where pride has been at the root of many problems. It can be subtle or in your face, but it is the same pride. I pray to die each in the Father’s arms so this world will see the love he has for them. If I cannot show it to others around me, who will?
Lately, the enemy has turned up the heat but God has been there to carry us through the flames. It has been tough, but God is refining my wife, my children and me so we can continue His destiny for us. Put the enemy UNDER your feet.
Thanx for all your hard work and perserverance in communcating God’s love to all of us each day. His word is always truth, we just need to get out of the way.
February 12th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
This has been a very timely topic. Sometimes it is so easy to see pride and ego in someone else and yet God always reveals a similar trait in me. Well, I thank Him every day that because I was made righteous through Jesus, my stance with Him is not diminished. Sometimes I think He chuckles at me when I try to get into the pity party I invite myself to!
February 12th, 2008 at 4:58 pm
RJ; I pray God will help you, give you peace and show you where He wants you to be.
I would like to rejoice about something. Our small business has been so slow this winter. My husband had lost so much confidence in what he can do. He still needs it back, he needs to feel he can be successful again. God has given us two businesses with little overhead expense. We have the mean to make money, but we need the sales.
Well, today my husband went and took on a flexible part time job.
In an area he likes to work in. This is an answer to prayer and needs at this time. I do pray God gives you a real blessing this very day, and thank Him for this extra means of making some money during our slow time.
February 12th, 2008 at 6:40 pm
LLS,
Once a man has a number of losses or failures he has a piece of his pride and self esteem go with each one. Men have a real need to know that their loved one respects them and reveres them. My wife and I had some very difficult times working through our issues when my industry crashed and my customers left. My self esteem and self image were in the tank. On one hand she really wanted me to feel good about myself so I could be energized to find a ‘right’ situation where I once again felt great. On the other hand it drove her nuts because I wasn’t providing for her the way I should have been. Because of that I was continually down about what I was capable of and withdrew from everything, thinking I would fail at each one. Slowly God began to work with me and provide patience to her, whispering to her that she needs to let go and exercise her faith, not her fear. That is when I really learned about the security part of women. Those years were some of the most painful yet most wisdom filled I have ever had.
Hang in there with your husband and, even though you may not understand what is going on, exercise your faith that GOD will work it out in his time. Just love God and don’t give up on your hubby.
February 12th, 2008 at 7:40 pm
Thanks so much Jon. I appreciate your writing.
I just hope God shows me whether I am to continue to work from home, or go out there in the world (something I am not quite looking forward to doing). I asked Him today to show me what to do and whether my husband really wants me out working or at home, where I mind the business and try to get the housework done!
February 12th, 2008 at 8:39 pm
I work in a Learning & Development Environment and at the moment have initiated an ongoing personal development myself to become a Christian Counsellor. The first truth that we are to establish as a ‘counsellor’ is the awareness, acknowledgement & understanding of Authority. Whose (supreme) authority are you under or submit to? Immediately the verse James 4:7 came to mind - Submit to God… I absorbed the context by reading both chapters 4 & 5. And was prompted to grab hold of this softskill and apply it daily in whatever I do.
February 12th, 2008 at 8:46 pm
Thank you for the reminder of “humility & the fear of the Lord”, my work is at a season of requiring a lot of time and my efforts towards finishing goals above and beyond have always been an ability of mine. I have taken and received praise for my work and most times don’t even acknowledge our Lord in my heart for the gifts He has given me to accomplish my tasks. We can do all things through Christ but with out His will we can’t even produce the oxygen in our lungs for our next breath.
To Him be all the glory, I thank you again for spurring me on.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:36 pm
I’m looking forward to growing in this area.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:53 pm
As a department head in the secular retail environment, I find myself constantly walking a thin line between pride & confidence. In my position I have to constantly be aware of the numbers and what I can do to drive/motivate others to drive them. Part of that is having that confidence (at least outwardly) that I can do that and do it better than the others. The humility comes in realizing and constantly reminding myself that it is because of my Lord and not my abilities that I am able to excel.
Another aspect of it is the realization that to be a leader you have to also be a servant, putting others before you, looking for ways you can make things better for them, honoring and respecting those you have been placed over. Perhaps in the end the best thing we can do is simply keep our eyes on Him. It’s when we take them off, (at least for me) that we rapidly end up out of love … and that is always sin. Be it pride, or some other action displeasing to God.
February 12th, 2008 at 11:25 pm
Hello, I’m Neill Newton, CEO and Founder - Global Flying Hospitals www.gloflyhos.org
Pride manifests itself as; Being opinionated, name dropping, relating of past grand achievements, openly talking about how people are affected by us, i.e. intimidated by us, or worship us (or if a man), how women are attracted to us …. through to the showiness of accessories, from the Mercedes to the Rolex and name brand clothing.
“Opinionated” is one of the worst manifestations, because it demonstrates an unwillingness to learn, to humble, to research, to honor others, to listen, to care. We become “know it alls”. But when we come to the realization that “everything” has a spiritual undergirding, we can get past all this. In other words, “We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against spiritual …” Satan can emesh us in the need for a designer lifestyle, or trick us to believe that if we are in management we need to be cruel and pushy, uncaring ….. or he will use our self-image against us by making us feel unworthy and useless, because we do not have this or that or fail in some skill, business, job or marriage. It is all a continuous spiritual battle to rob and destroy. And he has designer weapons for every occassion …. and for every person.
Prof. Jim Collins in his great research book; Good to Great, shows that the top CEO’s in certain top companies are “humble” (all business people should study this book). We can learn lessons from the secular world here.
Lifespan is a very short and very fast journey folks! Faith, humility, loving, caring and sharing are the hallmarks we should aim for … they last longer than a Rolex, Merc or even a pair of Jimmy Choo’s ….. eternity in fact!
Neill Newton
neillnewton@gmail.com
February 13th, 2008 at 12:01 am
I’ve always struggled with the difference between Cockiness and Confidence. I’m 44 and in the Car Business since I was 18. You need to be confident, and you want to feel good when you accomplished something special. But I worry about which one of the C’s it is.
I’ve always asked God for common sense and to be humble on a daily basis. I think I’ve missed some deserved joy after I did something well because I was afraid to look cocky. As most of you know the car business has some real charecters in it and I do not want to be compared to some of the unflattering ones.
Myself and another manager were transferred to one of our under performing stores 3 months ago. We are making positive gains. So I’m living this challenge right now. I want to feel good and tell friends what we are doing, but trying to do it the right way. Same problem most of us have playing sports as well.
February 13th, 2008 at 12:14 am
Thanks Neill for sharing from a “corporate” viewpoint and a biblical base. Not enough CEOs, CFOs, MBAs and professionals in general are willing to ‘risk’ being transparent to a degree with their employees, out of fear of course or with others at similar management levels out of peer pressure [fear]. God rewards the humble. Maybe not in the way or the time we want. But in the time and way that will benefit everyone concerned and bring Him glory. The big picture is always soooo much bigger than we can ever conceive . We are fools at best without God’s grace.
Anyway i was retiring for the evening and saw your post. This has been one of the busiest reply days i have seen on here. Go God and inspire our brother Mike!
peace of Christ rest on each postings author, Keith
February 13th, 2008 at 9:44 am
Amazing you should bring up humility. I recently got book by Pat Robertson on humility. I, too, must confess. I have health issues. For many years I have known drinking soda (specifically Diet Dr Pepper) was not good for a healthy person let alone me. But it was my only ‘vice’. Soda would get me through the day (coffee is not for me). As I was reading this new book, I suddenly realized I had been in rebellion to God. I had stubborn pride. How scary is that? I’m afraid there were many things I suddenly saw about myself in the matter of pride and none of them were flattering. Praise be to God! He is genly leading me on a trek of renewal. I, at that moment, gave up soda and just a few days later, He miraculously healed me of one my health challenges–fibromyalgia. Could it be, He had been waiting all those years for me to trade my pride for better health? My husband is amazed at how well I am doing. He likes the new me. My pride did not hurt just me, it affected my family and my commitment to the Lord. Pride is scary because it is so sneaky. How can God trust us with much if we don’t listen to the little things? I’m thankful that God’s grace does not demand our understanding, just our humility.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:21 am
Which Mountian are you climbing? This is the question I ask myself daily!
For me I have made good choices and many bad choices. It is always easy to call it ambition, but is that ambition about the “true treasures” or are they about the tresures of this world.
Once I asked for guidance and became humble in my endeavors, life has become simple. I wake everyday asking God to provide for my family’s needs. I wake and ask him to guided me through my day of business and activities. Its funny what happens when you ask for these things. He always gives us the opportunity to practice that which we have asked for.
At the end of my day, I ask God to reveal where I have had success and were I have failed to Love like Christ. I praise God for His steadfast love and patiences for it is only because of this that I am truely saved.
He is the truth, the way and the light -may you all be blessed in His Glory!
Thank you Jesus for keeping me Despreate but not Distracted,
In His service,
Robb
February 13th, 2008 at 11:36 am
As I grow to know Jesus better each day I am thankful for the enlightenment I recieve. You’re article has enlightened by even more. Thank you.
February 13th, 2008 at 11:46 am
TO RJ OLES I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT PEOPLES WORDS HAVE CRIPPLED YOU. VERBAL ABUSE IS MORE DANGEROUS TO A PERSONS EMOTIONAL HEALTH THAN PHISYCAL ABUSE. ONLY GOD CAN HEAL AND SET FREE. FRIST YOU MUST STOP LISTENING TO PAST VOICES, BUT RATHER LISTEN TO THE VOICE OF GODS WORD. FILL YOUR MIND WITH THE THINGS GOD SAYS ABOUT YOU. EVERY TIME YOU HEAR THE VOICE OF THE PAST, TURN IT AROUND AND TELL THAT VOICE WHAT GODS WORD SAYS. IF THE VOICE SAYS “YOUR A LOSER” YOU SAY BACK TO IT, THAT GODS WORD SAYS”THAT I AM MORE THAN A CONQUERER IN CHRIST JESUS” AND “WHO THE SON SETS FREE IS FREE INDEEED”. STAY ENCOURAGED AND PRESS ON. REFUSE TO BE DEFEATED. NOW LIFT UP YOUR HEAD YOU EVERLASTING DOOR. A SISER IN CHRIST
February 13th, 2008 at 11:55 am
“To whom much is given, much will be required.” That is the story of my life for the last couple of years. I was given a great gift and I have neglected to develop it due to arrogance, mule-headedness and just plain ol’ pride. For me it’s personal, but it spills over into my work life.
He has kept me in positions of humiliation so that I will not think so highly of myself, but many times it has ended up having the opposite effect. “I should be doing better than this!” or “I deserve to have the things I want! Why are THEY doing so well? I’m a CHRISTIAN!”
Ouch.
February 13th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Sounds familiar. What is your great gift?
February 13th, 2008 at 7:22 pm
I am posting to address M.P.’s regarding telltale signs of pridefulness.
First and foremost, I would say that a lack of dedicated time for prayer, fasting, and Bible reading is a clear sign of pride. When we neglect to give Father God the first fruits of our day, in prayer, we are saying, “God, I don’t really need you to direct my life, today”. When we do not exercise authority over our bodies, via fasting, we are saying, “God, I want to be close to you, BUT I need food more than I need more of You”. If we neglect to fill ourselves with His Word, then we are saying, “Your Word is good, but I don’t need to be filled and washed by it, everyday”–Jesus did all of these “as was His custom (habit)” — so are we better than He?
The second “sign” that I encounter on a regular basis is the concept of “generous giving”, which is all the rage among those with significant wealth. If we believe that we have been bought with a price, we are not our own, and everything that we have is God’s, then how can we be generous…if we own nothing?? The truth is that the Jews were and are bigger givers than modern Christians and the Followers/Disciples in the Bible(early church) gave ALL. Some of us boast that we are tithers (the tithe is His, so we don’t have a choice) and any giving beyond 10% should simply be described as obedient giving, as we are obedient and submitted to a generous God…He is truly the generous One, not us. Do you know anyone who has emptied their bank account and sowed it into the kingdom, as an act of obedience? I know only one!
Finally, as people who “make it happen” in the marketplace, we often refuse to wait on the Lord. Our patience and faith are often overwhelmed by external pressures and a level of pride from past accomplishments. What God wants to do in your life, tomorrow, will make yesterday look elementary, so what makes us think we can help Him and push things along? What if He is touching hearts, opening doors, and preparing the way, so that we can succeed without striving–and then He gets the glory. No we want to steal His glory, so we push along. Sometimes we need to pray more and “Do” less and in this “act” we declare our need and dependance on Him!
On humility, if we spend more time at the feet of Jesus, in the presence of Father God, then humility is a natural part of our life–trust me there is no room for pride or ego in His Presence, where He reveals the truth to us.
I, personally, coach executives and business owner and these are the most challenging areas. What I have learned in my own life and paid a significant price to gain, I share with others. Live in His presence and you will not have personal issues of pride–rather you will walk very comfortably in true humility and reverent fear of the Lord
RJ–I would like to share my testimony and a chapter from my upcoming book with you. I understand what the lack of a natural father can do to a boy and I know what a relationship with a heavenly Father does to build that boy into royalty. Send me your e-mail. mri@trinityi.org
February 13th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
RE: Kirk Browning
The great gift is at least two very powerful anointings, the likes of which have never been seen before (or so I’ve been told). But because of the preparation necessary to use them appropriately (and not become proud in the process) I have been ground down to almost nothing. Sadness is an almost constant companion in my personal life and at the same time I feel the heart of God weeping for so many people around me that too often I shut it out. Let someone else deal with it…I have my own heartaches to worry about.
The pride I’m dealing with is the kind that says, “No, God. It’s MY turn! Fix MY life and THEN we’ll talk about everyone else!” But it’s not my life, but it doesn’t matter…I still refuse to submit. God forgive me, I will not bow until I am good and darn ready to do so.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:39 pm
wow. what a post forum. The blog that keeps on giving. I had a chance to humble myself last night and decided to be “righteous”. What a mess. My “righteousness” is thru His being made a curse on a tree. With out Him we can truly do NOTHNG!
WE ALL ARE WORKS IN PROGRESS. AGAIN LET US LABOR TO ENTER HIS REST?
any thoughts on this process , ANYONE?
KEITH
February 13th, 2008 at 11:52 pm
Thanks for helping us focus on humility and for taking the lead in recognising this problem in your own life. Pride and self-importance is the root cause of all evil and sorrow that has come into this world and is the main achilles heel of us all.
I often wonder at how subtly the enemy can infiltrate my mind with thoughts based on an arrogant mindset. Therefore it is very important for us to keep reminding each other about this dangerous pitfall and to watch over each other.
February 14th, 2008 at 4:46 pm
Firstly, I would like to say how awesome God is in regards to the timing of this blog. The evening before reading this, the lesson in my mid week service dealt with this same subject.
As a person with physical challenges I’ve been inspired by the many post that I receive, and have embarked upon a few opportunities of self-employment. I know what it is to be excited about the success of pursuing success. Yet, I as well as many must realize it is the Lord who has given us the ability to succeed.
We are not to have a posture or attitude that we’re insignificant, but we must not think more highly of ourselves than we should. I believe the one thing that can help us stay humble is the consciousness of knowing that as we walk in His ability to reclaim the various mountains of cultural influence; our success though rendering personal benefits, is ultimately purposed to reflect God’s glory.
He that is greatest among you is first a servant
February 14th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
Greetings,
I was reminded as I read your message that we must have the tunic of humility before we can actually wear our armour as found in Eph.6 Also Thess reminds us that it is faith working through love that covers our hearts- this is the composition of our breastplate of righteousness.
Just some valuable thoughts for you,
Sentone
February 14th, 2008 at 8:39 pm
An observation that I’m blessed to receive. Thank you, and may the Father continue to smile on yo.
February 14th, 2008 at 8:48 pm
OK… I confess I’m technically challenged. Those of you who wrote - were those meant for me? Am I to respond or come back to this forum? A little slow on the uptake here on the blogging.
Another thougth on humility. I recently learned this and believe it to be a relevation from the Holy Spirit. About 5 months ago, I was asked to speak at a confernce for women leaders in ministry on the topic “How to have a Esther annointing vs a Jezebel spirit.” Didn’t know much and then lived it two weeks before presenting.
Here’s the long and short - and you can all correct me if I’m wrong. (I try to stay teachable.) You submit and crucify the flesh - BE HUMBLE - when you are dealing with a personality. You do NOT - when you suspect a Jezebel spirit which is demonstrated by manipulation, domination, and control. We are not to give this spirit - or receive it.
Any thoughts on this one?
Pat Baldridge
www.c12group.com
CHarlotte, NC Chair
February 15th, 2008 at 12:10 am
Have a look at this site http://www.drmarius.com which is dedicated to
• the healing process of
• the whole person
• in the light of Biblical premises.
February 16th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
A lot of people have responded to this blog in a myriad of viewpoints, some legalistic, some preachy, and some that are honest and usable, and I pray that people who read these can discern which ones are which…but what I want to bring to the mix is that I believe some of these are confusing confidence with humility, and to be frank, if we are to grasp and believe the promises of the bible, i.e. I am the head and not the tail, I am a joint heir with Jesus Christ, to name a few, then by just hearing these things, some would think we were not being humble…but we need that confidence in who we are in Christ, and I, for one, will not let anyone tell me that I am being prideful when I speak these words over my life. On the other hand, I have heard many wonderful christians tell me how they are like a worm, just saved by grace…thinking they are just super humble. We need confidence, and we need to be confident to step out and do things, but that is not what humility is…to be humble simply means to acknowledge that without God, nothing is possible, to give the credit where credit is due, and that is not to you.
I don’t believe that God doesn’t want us to succeed, and whether that is at sales, or being a top athlete, the difference is when we realize it is not us at all, it is the grace and wonderful caring nature of our God that allows us to succeed, and when it goes to our head, and we certainly know when that happens, then we need to step back and repent and get back to the realization of whose hands we are really in. Could being humble be so simply described as this….living down to earth with a heavenly attitude? What do you think!! Bea
February 16th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Bea: I definitely can be condident in what I have in Christ, and no one can take it away. I’m an heir of everything, right here and right now (it doesnt wait for eternal life) I can be confident also that my business is run on good principles and I am confident we provide good service and products.
The only I thing I struggle with is suceess.
I know Christians all over who are business owners who are not making it, and I know families who are not making it. Sometimes things are up, and sometimes not. I dont believe we are guaranteed to be successful (as a few TV ministries would suggest), because our idea of successful is not the same as His, and our plans are not always on the mark with His.
I think if the rain falls on the just and unjust, then that’s just the way it’s going to be in this fallen world.
February 16th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Bea,
Beautifully put! I put my thoughts on this blog Tuesday and your correct some were way to legalistic. God created us to enjoy us and HE DOES want to bless us! It’s not always going to happen the way we want it to go but we should walk with confidence, but working hard to stay grounded at the same time.
February 16th, 2008 at 5:09 pm
LLS, yes, we do live in a fallen world, and I have learned a long time ago, to never compare myself to other christians, business persons, etc…as you have NO idea why they prosper or do not prosper…you can only really know YOU!
The attitude of the rain falling on the just and the unjust is certainly fatalistic, and I would ask you then, why even try…is this just a game of odds??
I think not, and I know from the Word of God that John 10:10 says Beloved, ABOVE ALL, I wish that you would prosper and be in good health, even as thy soul prospers…and furthermore, another verse talks about God taking PLEASURE in the prosperity of His servant. Sound like God doesn’t want us to fail…and actually, His Word is a manual of how TO succeed. Indeed there are plenty of examples, just like the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, is that not a guarantee??
If your idea of success is only money, then you are missing what meaning of the word “prosperity” is in the Greek, and it encompasses also healing, peace, and a few other things.
Ultimately, if you are applying the principles of the bible to your life and business, you cannot help but succeed…PLUS..if we have no guarantee of success as christians, after following the biblical manual, then what kind of God would we be serving?? The thing with the bible, is you have to believe it is either all true, or all false, you can’t take verses out of context. When the verse about the rain falling on the just and the unjust, you must connect is to the previous verse where it says..But I tell you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, (comma there for a reason) to show that you are the children of your Father Who is in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the wicked and on the good, and makes the rain fall upon the upright and the wrongdoers alike.
Matthew Henry commentary says about this that “these gifts of common providence are dispensed indifferently to good and evil, just and unjust; so that we cannot know love and hatred by what is before us, but by what is WITHIN us” If we look at the rain and say well, God doesn’t love us anymore, then how would we look at a enemy or brother who isn’t doing us proper justice on a certain day.
It takes a lot of your own study to make you what you are, and like I said before, if you are applying His principles to your life, then you will ALWAYS be on the mark with Him!! and to quote Martha Stewart, and that’s a good thing!!! bea
February 16th, 2008 at 9:10 pm
I have a harbinger for pride - lack of listening - when I cease listening on any level it is an alarm meant to bring me to awareness of great danger…sadly I have also failed to listen to the alarm, but glady Holy Spirit is faithful and Jesus has not failed to bring me to the position the Father requires…it depends on me how long we take to get there. Shorter is better than longer, for me, God is implacable. May we ever have ears to hear what the Spirit says… and hearts to obey instantly.
February 16th, 2008 at 11:48 pm
Nope, I dont take verses out of context. I’ve been too well trained in Precept and other wonderful inductive study techniques to do that.
But what I am saying is, good things happen to Christians and bad things happen to Christians. Success is not just monetary, and I truly do not believe that every Christian is guaranteed their business will totally succeed. Nor do I truly believe every family out there that is just doing all they can and doing it God’s way, will have total wealth or succcess.
We have brothers and sisters suffering all over the world who are doing all they can to serve God and honor Him and no doubt many do not have material goods at all. But their success is in their servanthood, and their lifestyle which honors Him.
Right now my church is doing a makeover in an extremely poor and crime ridden section of town. We’ve seen people who tried to make a go of life, and who dont have anything to show for it. Yet they love God no matter what. No doubt, some of them lost everything they ever had, and now they cant afford much. But God is using some area churches and one local pastor to help those folks. You cant tell *them* that God meant for them to succeed, so they shouldnt be living below poverty level. I just hope no one here is saying that! Many of us dont believe in that “Joel You Know Who” mentallity from TV. I hope no one here is saying you dont have enough faith if you’re not making it!
(Oh, and the verse on prospering is actually from III John verse 2. My pastor is covering it tomorrow, and I’m one of the ones who gets his notes on this ahead of time. According to him and other commentaries, it doesnt have to do with prosperity per se, but was a greeting to Gaius, wishing that he would prosper as much physically as his soul was prospering. So no, we can’t take it out of context and just plunk it down but some do and will continue to try.
February 17th, 2008 at 12:07 am
sounds like you have it all figured out, so I will abstain from commenting, except to say that “joel” does talk about prosperity, and if that is a dirty word, then stay as you are…however, to bash him because of that, is bashing a servant of Jesus Christ, and last time I checked, that is totally NOT what Jesus wants us to do. Joel Osteen provides much encouragement for christians and non-christians alike, and may God bless him and you.
bea
February 17th, 2008 at 1:04 am
II timothy 4:3.
God bless you too.
February 17th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
This is my third reply on this subject. WE have to remember how Satan tries to play us. He tells us were not good or worthy when we have done something good or want to present to others an idea we have. And on the flipside he likes to trick us saying how great we are so we go past confidence to arrogance and sounding cocky.
He will fight us on all sides of the subject. Remember he can’t hurt God only those that God loves, he doesn’t want us to shine because this will give God glory and he hates that! On this blog subject he is winning because two of you are going at each other, and he’s just laughing at us.
So I think we need to ask Jesus for discermant on who we are and reveal to us how we should act. He want’s to bless us so bad, just like when you are direct when you tell someone at work what you need we need to ask Him what we want, need and hope for.
February 18th, 2008 at 10:10 am
Sorry to see the barbs…. for the most part I have enjoyed reading everybody’s input. I would like to point out that whether you like Joel’s style of encouragement or not - he is more likely to lead someone to Christ than 2 Christians bickering over the Bible. We must ALWAYS be concious of the example we are setting. I’d hate for someone who’s on the fence come in and see us going at each other. That being said - I let myself get baited a couple times and felt convicted of it later. Scott’s right - don’t let the enemy in! So many have so much to offer here!
February 18th, 2008 at 11:08 am
Hmmmm, Bea asked what we thought. I merely stated what I thought. Then she proceeded to tell me not to use verses out of context, while she completely took III John verse 2 out of context.
Now if you think this is bickering, you havent been on many Christian blogs. Last I heard, we can agree to disagree on points which are not major doctrines in the Christian faith. It doesn’t mean you are going at it, it means you’re most likley on a blog!
That said, there are far more well known pastors, teachers, and evangelists who are weighing in on this well known TV ‘ministry’. And for the most part, what they are coming up with is a watered down Gospel which preaches feel good, over repent and be saved. Their opinion not mine. Name it and claim it, is alive and well.
We’re given the gift of discerment for a reason. Apologetics exists for a reason, and to use your head, be a Berean and search the Scriptures to see if these things are true or not, is not bashing. Satan may be having a laugh, but it’s because people are no longer told to repent and be saved, turn from sin, but first understand what sin really is in your life. If the Holy Spirit is convicting yourself of something, you’d better not ignore it and toss it away as a negative thought. It probably needs to be dealt with.
Find a church where the Bible is taught line by line, or at least correctly interpreted. Kay Arthur has great courses where you can really learn to study the Bible in context (Precepts). Take a course in apologetics, learn somethihng about observation, interpretation and application. There is way more to it than pullling out a fluffy verse here and there and trying to make it fit. It’s not going to work to go up to the poor, homeless and the sick and try to tell them to get rid of negative thoughts in their minds. We’re really missing the mark in America.
February 18th, 2008 at 11:46 am
To all whom I offended, please forgive me, my intention was never to have sounded like I was bickering…forgive me for my passion for the Word of God, and forgive me for crediting 3 John 2 with John 10:10…bea
February 18th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
No Bea, forgive me. I let some of the negativity that flows through here get to me and hit send just begging for the response I got. Don’t ever lose that passion!
February 18th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
thanks lorisa, and I won’t lose it, and God Bless You!! bea
February 19th, 2008 at 11:53 am
II Timothy 4:3 For the time will come when they will NOT ENDURE SOUND Doctrine; but after THEIR OWN LUSTS shall they heap to THEMSELVES TEACHERS, having “itching ears”.
II Timothy 4:4
And THEY SHALL TURN AWAY their EARS FROM THE “TRUTH”, and shall be TURNED UNTO “FABLES.”
II Timothy 4:5
But WATCH THOU IN ALL “THINGS”, endure afflicitions, do the WORK of an EVANGELIST, make full PROOF of thy MINISTRY
II Timothy 4:6
For I am NOW ready to be OFFERED, and the time of my departure is at hand.
II Timothy 4:7
I have FOUGHT a GOOD FIGHT, I have FINISHED my COURSE, I have KEPT the FAITH:
II Timothy 4:8 Henceforth there is laid up for ME A “CROWN of RIGHTEOUSNESS”, which the LORD, the “righteous judge”, shall give me at that day: and NOT to me only, but unto ALL THEM THAT LOVE his appearing.
Joel Osteen is an ANOINTED man of GOD….
Blessings to you all
In Christ Love
Paula
February 19th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
http://www.crosswalk.com/news/commentary/11557558/
February 20th, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Dear Michael,
I am thankful for the wisdom that God pours through you! You asked for thoughts on the “soft skills”. Humility seems to be simply what happens when we “see” things as they really are. It results when we are close to Him. “In His sight” we humble ourselves. The reverential, worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. We are not to be unaware of the schemes of the enemy to keep us from being close to Him (offense, condemnation, etc.) and to try to get us to take His glory (the credit for what He does) by bringing the deception of the stranger’s flattering voice to our ear.
Blessings, Lynn Allen
March 17th, 2008 at 10:32 am
[...] of our most responded to blog entries was when I recently mentioned (Feb 12th) the need for soft skills. I am proud to say I began with a discussion on humility. (o-; [...]
March 20th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
The Lord brought me to read two little books that have severally challenged me along these lines: Humility, and Absolute Surrender both by Andrew Murray. I highly recommend them.
Doug Caton
April 14th, 2008 at 11:33 am
Michael,
Excellent post, thank you for sharing that word. Soft skills are indeed often overlooked and should be given more attention.
-Jen
July 17th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
[...] Selling among wolves writes about soft skills vs. hard skills. [...]